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Why Do I Write? Lady Gemini

Why do I write, you ask?

Such simplicity in this question but the answer is more complex.

I write to remember. I write to forget. I write about the questionable things, to see if they’ll make sense.

I write when things are easy. I write when things are hard. I write to be eternal, captured in a word, for future generations to one day reminisce.

I write for my heart. I write for my soul, to keep things together, to help me feel whole. I write for those I’m missing. I write for when I’m one of those who’s missed.

To sum up my answer clearly, in case you hadn’t guessed, I sometimes write for everything and nothing but mostly I’m just writing for myself.

___________

Lady Gemini

artathan (2)

Why Do I Write? Lindsey Campbell

I write so I won’t forget

I write all the places I’ve been.

I write all the things I’ve seen.

I write so I won’t forget sadness, fear, pain, pleasure,

and always, so not to forget love.

I write to undo, and do it all again.

I write to make sense of myself,

in words for which there are no words.

I write to explain myself, to me.

I write myself a map of myself.

I write so I don’t lose myself, again.

I write to lose it all, and win it back.

I write to remember, and I write to forget.

I write to know and un-know.

I write to find the questions, queries, and curiosities.

I write the daily.

I write the banal.

I write the questions with no answers, and I write the answers to no questions.

I write to come to know, and to come to be.

I write because I live between the lines.

I write and un-write and write again.

I write what I know.

I write what I don’t.

I write to discover things I didn’t know I knew.

I write to uncover anew.

I write because I don’t know how not to.

I write because I have to.

I write.

________________

My name is Lindsey. I’m a single, medicated, Bipolar, perpetual graduate student, waitress, with myriad chronic mental and physical health issues. Oh, and by the way, I’m one hell of a good mom.

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Another Sleepless Night

Originally posted on BravelyBipolar:

My pdoc has given me enough medication that I should be sleeping soundly through the night.  Well, instead I start to fall asleep about 6pm (before I take my bedtime meds).  As per usual, last night I fell asleep around 6pm until about 8pm.  I got up  and took my bedtime meds.  I had a bit of a second wind…well until my husband gently shook me and told me to head up to bed.  I had such hopes of sleep.

This is about the third night in a row that I’ve woken up around 2am or 3am.  This is not a good sign. This could be a pre curser to mania.  I’m usually waking up because my mind is racing (I’m taking so much Clonazapam that this shouldn’t happen) or I’m waking up with migraines.  Again, this shouldn’t be happening either.  Oh ya and I’ve gained 10 pounds since I…

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